15 July, 2023

The Twelve Days of Christmas


Nine years ago, things got a little dicey in the shower room whilst I was painting.

I had managed to enter without my Kindle, and my hands were so covered in paint that I would not touch it even if it had been there. This meant I had to make my own entertainment. For some reason I started singing the Twelve Days of Christmas whilst painting. I was doing well until 'four'. It turned out there were 'four something-somethings'. But apart from that the song progressed well until day 10.

It was at that point I really started deviating from the original lyrics. On the 10th day a restraining order was taken out because I was knee-deep in bird poo, had poisoned my family with too many pears and goose eggs. The 11th day was spent hiring a hitman, and the 12th day was spent in the peace of a jail cell.

It is often not a good idea for me to make my own entertainment.

No comments:

Post a Comment